A German MVP? Can't be worse than a Canadian...

For most of the NBA season the MVP has been a race between two-time award winner Steve Nash and the dirty German Dirk Nowitzki. Nash started as the clear favorite for a three-peat until Dirk and the Mavs tore up the league for a three-month stretch that included a 52-5 record and three 12+ game winning streaks. Nash stormed back last week by single handedly beating Dirty D and the Dallas Three in a 2OT thriller as Dirk lost the game, his composure, and possibly the MVP by blowing two late free throws. So who is the MVP this year? Well that depends on your interpretation of the award. Some say it's the player his team simply can't win without, others say it's the best player on the best team, and a few would even say it should go to the most talented player in the league. So instead of everyone fighting over a single acronym, I've taken the liberty myself of handing out multiple awards based on each player's own effect on his team and the league.

B.O.P. - (Best on Planet) - To Kobe Bryant who is far and away the most talented player - which is to say - pure scorer alive today. He might be the best one-on-one player the league has ever seen and can make any given shot on any given night. He's also one of the leagues most underrated shut down defenders. The problem? Kobe isn't even the MVP of his own team. Lamar Odom is a better passer, rebounder, and all around team player than Kobe. When he gets hot he can score 25-30 points any night. In fact, the Lakers have been without Odom in 14 of the Lakers 32 losses this season. Without Kobe, they're 3-2 including a win against Phoenix where Odom tallied 34 points, 10 rebounds, and 6 assists. Oh, and Kobe travels… a lot. Probably has something to do with it.

M.I.P. - (Most Important Player) - To Shaquille O'Neal who at 35 years old doesn't show up for half the season, doesn't lead his team in any category, probably doesn't practice, can't shoot free throws, and puts on 30 pounds each off season. Still, he could be the cornerstone of any championship team. His inside presence, size, and strength on both sides of the ball make him a factor every second he's on the floor. What's worse is that he plays good, smart defense, so it's hard to get him into foul trouble. Add all this to his charm and personality and you've got probably one of the most important players in the history of the league.

B.P.C.B. - (Best Player/Crazy Bastard) - To Gilbert Arenas. He may score 30 a night and be one of the best second round pick-ups in recent years... he's also just a crazy bastard. He yells "hibachi" when shooting threes, wears shorts of the opposing team to bed, thinks everyone is out to get him and tried to stop a cop from arresting his friend by running over the cop. Still he's a good player and a good interview... I'd just rather not be in the same room as him.

B.P.B.T. - (Best Player, Best Team) - To Dirk Nowitzki. There's no doubt that Dirk owns the title… at least this year. He averages 25 points and 10 rebounds. He shoots over 50% from the field, 40% from three, and 90% from the line and has yet to him miss from the elbow this season. Even with how talented he is though, without a 79-point performance by Jerry Stackhouse, Jason Terry and Josh Howard, the Suns would have trampled the Mavericks. In fact, in the three games this season where he played 10 minutes or less, the Mavs won all three in convincing fashion. Dallas is so deep and talented that they don't need Dirk to win, they're just that much better when he's on the floor.

M.V.P. - (Most Valuable Player) - To Steve Nash. Sure the last two years have been a good barometer, but this season he's even better - especially that hair cut (sexy sexy). Take the game in Dallas where he scored 32 points and handed out 16 assists. If we assume all his assists lead to 2-point baskets - which they don't - he was personally responsible for 64 points in Dallas, 66 against Washington, and 68 in New Jersey earlier this year. On two of his lowest scoring nights this year he had over 20 assists, so even when he's having an off night, he's smart enough and humble enough to defer and create baskets for his teammates. Phoenix is 2-4 without him this year and 4-12 without him over the last three seasons. This coming from a team averaging 60+ wins a season during that same span. They may have survived much of last year without Barbosa or Stoudemire, but Phoenix has proven this season, that they can't go a week without Nash.

To be honest, I'm just glad sportswriters vote on these awards and not the fans. I don't know if I could take Yao Ming winning his 5th straight MVP award after another long stint on the injured list.